Simple joys Posted at 9:33 AM 0 comments (+) Written on the 29th of May in my little makeshift diary:

"The days leading up to my 19th birthday were not smooth sailing. My emotions were all over the place. Getting angsty at the slightest things, feeling upset over minute issues and expecting disappointments. I was so convinced that this was going to be my worst birthday ever, because of the GP exam and econs quiz, then the principal's talk on top of all those.

But all the drama was uncalled for. My 19th birthday was definitely a far cry from the flood of gifts and surprise after surprise on my 16th, nor was it even something close to the sweet and private 17th and 18th. But this birthday must have been by far, the most emotionally fulfilling one I've had.

Simple joys.

Because life always takes people away, or rather, people choose to walk away. Some people are only here for a short stay, some may have left a deep impression, or walked a long way alongside me, or perhaps been there when I needed them. Because of the way life works, I am so thankful for what I have now, people who love me for me. It is indeed not easy for friends to stay friends, unless they fight hard for each other. So today, while I am still in this slightly melancholic mood, I am going to write this down and command myself to remember how this feels like.

When I hear unpleasant news from others about my friends, sometimes I feel my heart shatter into pieces. Sometimes I feel betrayed. Sometimes I don't even know what to feel. In light of all these emotions, as I felt hot and cold all over, it serves as a perfect contrast for what had just happened - the wonderful people and the wonderful things they did for me to tell me they care, as I turned another year older. And because of these people and these things they do, I stopped trembling in my heartbreak and felt better instantaneously. Infinitely.

To Josephine, Shixian and Kexin:



People whom I spend my everyday with, people who get the absolute worst of my temperaments, people who never stopped giving me chances despite my snappy attitude. We came together initially for the same cause, but now it is turning into something else. It is no longer pure accompaniment, now it is about friendship. We stick together not because we have to, but because we are friends, and friends don't give up on each other. Friends accept the flaws of each other.

I thank you girls for giving me a light-hearted, yet at the same time, very memorable 27th May. It was a short day, we could hardly do much, but I had enjoyed myself so much over the steamboat dinner, laughing at the lame jokes we crack, talking about everything under the sun and having a good time. Due to the events in the day, I already know we don't have time for much, but you girls still managed to make it such a great night for me.

All the days when i'm having a bad day and I snap at you girls, I'm sorry and thank you for not bearing a grudge and forgiving me willingly. All the days I was too quick in judging and hurt you girls, I'm sorry and thank you for not walking away from me. Thank you girls, for the wonderful, wonderful 27th of May.

To Taylin, Irene and Yijun:



Indescribable, what you girls can do. People who always make things right, no matter how long it has been since we last caught up, no matter what went wrong again. People who always make me feel on top of the world, and whom I can be myself with. 4 people with 2 years in between, it is always a surprise that we stuck together so well. I am so proud of us for staying so close until now, 4 years since we first came together.

Thank you girls, for the truly magical 28th May. Picnic at the park opposite JP, with all the food you girls had specially brought and bought, and the balloon that burst into my eye (LOL). All the catching up about school, our families, even about relationships. A good day of relaxing and having fun over a game of taboo.

Thank you girls, for all the past years of respect and love, and true concern. Thank you Irene, for always being my venting outlet when you would try to provide me with some advice or alternative to which I'd snap at you sometimes. For all those times, sorry and thank you because even as you felt unhappy or sad that I am doing this to you, you still provided yourself as my venting outlet and allowed me the right to do so because I am upset. For the times you get agitated at somebody who mistreated me and made me feel unhappy, the times you stood up for me. For this, I thank you.



Thank you Taylin, for never giving up on me. I loved your present, with the bits and pieces of memories of the 4 of us over the years, and all those words. Yes, I needed those words. For the times that I was nasty to you over issues concerning the SC, I am sorry and thank you because you never flared up at me for dissing what you love, and yet always accept everything I say with a sheepish smile. For the times you were there, relentlessly cheering me on when I was feeling hopeless, helpless and lost. I thank you for making me feel special to you.

Thank you Yijun, for being a person who always cares about me and making the effort to keep up with what is going on in my life. For the times i was unsupportive of your relationship and did not want to hear you out, I am sorry and thank you for not walking out on me, because you have every right to do so. For the times you listened patiently to what I have to say, provided me with advice when I needed them, and happiness and smiles all the time, I thank you.

Thank you girls for 28th of May which will be etched deep in my heart for it was when I discovered the satisfaction in the simple joys of having a picnic prepared by my loved ones. It was today that I realised, the value of such simple joys.

To Sharman and Wenyi:



I am forever thankful that I have you girls with me, just a text or call away to make everything right. For listening patiently, and being on my side most of the time. It was a great day, the 29th of May. Exploring unknown lands (hehe) and staying out till after dark just chilling out and enjoying ourselves for a little bit. And of course, giving in to me that I had to cut our day shorter, never blaming me for being this way, regardless of all the time and effort you girls had put in to move me on.

Thank you Sharman for... well, simply for being my best friend. there is too much to thank you for. The study sessions as and when I needed them, be it on a weekend when you could otherwise spend lazing on your sofa, or late at night when you knocked off from work. The gym and running sessions when I felt like I needed a break sometimes. The countless heart-to-hearts we've had over the years, how you've never judged me despite my ability to be a real bitch sometimes and say spiteful things about people I don't like, how you've always believed that I had something so much greater in me just waiting for me to allow it to work its wonders. You are truly the best friend anyone can ask for, and am I glad that you are mine! :P



Thank you for the present, it brings a silly smile to my face every time I take them out to read. Every one of them deeply embedded with your faith for me, and how you want to make things right for me, be it in my studies or with other friends or even issues of the heart. Thank you for being a reliable and loving best friend to me for so long.

Thank you Wenyi for being true to me, despite us being asteroids that crash into each other sometimes. We don't always see eye to eye on all issues, but it does not stand in our way to being such close friends. Over the short 2 years or so that we've known each other, thank you for always accepting me as I am , even if I hurt you, and never trying to change me to what you wish I'd be. Thank you for keeping me close even after you'd left the school. I am still heartened by the times you enthusiastically ask when would be the next time we would meet up. Time tells, as you had proven to me what real friends should be like.

For the times in the past when we'd had the little row here and there, I'm sorry and thank you because despite all of that you still remain close and faithful to me as a friend and by now I have already realised how hard it is for friends like you come by. To our days of "mugging" at Pioneer Mall macs, the sessions at Starbucks, or the school library or anywhere else. Thank you for being such a great friend to me. Thank you girls.

For all the times I was unkind, I judged, I teased or gave my bad attitude. I am thankful that these people never left me, never gave up on me and always made things right.

Because life takes people away. Because time passes and people change. They walk away. Tonight I am writing these down so that I will never forget the way I felt when I heard those words. When the world was shaking, these faces came into my mind and stabled the quakes. Tonight I am reminded of what it truly means to be a friend. An unwavering, faithful and all-forgiving one. I am thankful I have you girls around, all of you.

Remember that for all that you love me, I love you as much.
From the bottom of my heart. "

Also, special thanks to Chienying and Kailin who couldn't celebrate my birthday with me but have been great friends to me for the past years.

Thank you Chienying, it's been about 4.5 years since you left but you're still here with me. We've both grown older and gone separate ways but nobody can explain the way you make everything okay whenever I am talking to you. For all the hours on end that you listened to me ramble on about life, to the countless advices you've given me over the years, the support you were always generous to provide me with and your belief in me that always empowers me. I am fortunate to have met you and have you been such a close part of my life. More time will pass, and more things will change yet. We can't stop some things from happening. I don't know if the days that I'm walking the streets of Melbourne in your company will ever come, but I know I'll never forget the way you made me feel.

And to Kailin, you are yet another story I will be proud to look back on. Bad times have passed us by and I am glad that you have accepted me as I am and never left me again. Although we can't always meet up, and we don't really even have the chance to talk very much, I know that you care about me and that is enough. Thank you for believing in me, and always encouraging me for my academics or listening to me for the rare few times we talked. Thank you for giving me this whole revelation to begin with. I am glad that we have what we have now. Thank you for being a worthy friend.

Others: