Posted at 2:36 AM 0 comments (+) I'm tired. I don't knw what I'm writing.

Still grasping in the darkness, trying to find some form of compromise, wishing hoping praying that the people who matter would understand. Insecurities, feelings of undeserving strike me sometimes especially in my moments of weakness. I can't get better.

Trust. Is there trust? Why am I still questioning, still unsure? Why am I still playing this game? I'm disappointed. I thought you knew.

People make me so upset sometimes but I feel like I don't deserve to feel so. Burden. Suddenly a good thing became a burden, an act of love became a burden. I feel burdened.

I still think horrible things. I'm still selfish.
Please don't ever be nice to me anymore because I am so undeserving of it. Please don't love me because I'm a difficult person to love.

I'm so tired.