安慰别人的道理我那么多 还以为我真的都 

Finding things to do. Finding assurance in the nice things people say to me. Finding comfort in the things I can control. Learning to find....my own source of strength. 

I can tell her with such conviction about how we should learn to be okay alone, without always having to rely on another person who is not even a constant in our lives. I can tell her to seek comfort by doing things she loves. I can tell her that not everything is always within control, and not to beat herself up when it isn't. Sometimes, things are not our fault, and we need to realise this.

I can tell her everything I can see but find it hard to do myself. 

I still care too much about things people will think or say about me. I am still too afraid of failing. I still... I.... 

Still too weak. Still too far

from stable 

from perfectly alright. 

There is only a thin line between being unaffected and apathetic. 

Sometimes I don't knw which side I'm on.

在看见别人不愿为我付出后
渐渐地 自己对别人的帮助 谅解 关心 爱 也越来越吝啬
因为他们不屑为我 我也开始收起了愿意付出的心
所以每帮一次都觉得好像需要费上很大 很多 的力与心思才能完成
有点担心后来的我会干脆就这样
说服自己谁都不需要后 一个人变成隐形人
慢慢消失掉